Guest Post by @EmerKelly_
My inner nudge and I have a volatile relationship. It’s the part of me that likes to indulge, the voice in my head that tells me 2pm is a FINE time to quit working, flop on the couch and watch Seinfeld on repeat. Or the part of me insists I run outside every time the sun shows it’s face (Even in summer, which can lead to certain, er, productivity problems). Its suggestions are so often ridiculous that I’ve become accustomed to ignoring it.
Lately though, I’ve started to re-define the relationship between my nudge and I. This redefinition began last Thursday.
I recently took up Crossfit and was really enjoying the classes. It was a foundation course full of people as clueless as myself, learning the correct way to move, bend, lift and heave.
We were on our final class, facing our toughest workout yet and my nudge was regretting having come at all. I snapped at it to quiet down, and threw myself into the moves. They were exhausting. Limb-tremblingly exhausting. I made it through to the Burpee round and was about half-way through when my nudge broke its silence.
‘You’re too tired. You need to modify NOW.’
‘Not yet’ said I, ‘One more textbook Burpee, I’ve got this’.
I absolutely didn’t have it. Half-way through the move all my limbs gave out and I did a kind of weird, back-wrenching belly-flop onto the floor. Crap.
‘I told you so…’
‘Shut it, Nudge!’
I quivered to my feet and hobbled out of the class. I spent the weekend lying on my back, undergoing mediation sessions with Nudge.
Was it really the part of myself that liked to indulge? Or, was it just trying to look out for me?
That time it wanted me to watch Seinfeld, I had been working late the night before – I probably needed the R&R. And as for chasing sunshine? Turns out I’m horribly vitamin D deficient.
What if my nudge isn’t the annoying, self-indulgent voice in my head, but the part of me understands my needs at their deepest level? What if it’s the part of me in charge of self-care, that knows when to push me, and when to let me rest? What if I’ve had it wrong all this time?
Take a hard-learned lesson from me: next time you’re engrossed in something and your nudge pipes up, listen to it carefully and trust that it has your best interests at heart. You might be surprised at what you can achieve together.